The tale of the crooked eye!

Ok, many of you know I have had a lazy eye since I was born. Growing up I had 3, 4, maybe even 5 surgeries. They cut the muscles in my eye and try to pull it in so it is straight. My Grandma Holyoak told stories of watching me after surgery and my eye squirting blood. The last surgery I remember was in fifth grade. I made the mistake of looking at my eye in the bathroom mirror. It was a gruesome bloody sight I'll never forget. Alex had surgery to straighten her eye when she was four. That day on the way home she had her eyes open, never complained of it hurting, and no gushing blood at all. This is what I am hoping for tomorrow. If she can do it, I can do it. We're even using the same doctor. Here are some pre operation pictures. My wonderful husband and kids say they don't notice my eye much. Most of my close friends say they don't either. Innocent little kids in library are a different story. They couldn't lie! I'll call on them, they look behind them. I say no, you. Who?....Me?.....Oh, thought you were talking to someone else. It has forced me to get to know every single child's name in our school. Pre-k through 5th, you can bet I know their name. I get an answer I want to a question with out the embarrassing look behind.
I am terrified to see what tomorrow brings. I'm afraid I'll be in pain. I take great pride in not being a wuss, girly girl kind of wife and mom. I can do anything, I'm super Mom. Good thing Clay is taking me to the surgery center, I'll have to put on a brave face and be strong. He did not marry a baby! I've had nightmares the last couple of weeks of not waking up from anesthesia, Clay worries about me going blind and him having to braid the girls hair. I am TERRIFIED, hopefully it will all be worth it. I've been praying for days to be watched over and protected and to make this surgery a success. I'm getting a blessing to put my mind at ease. I feel strongly that this is the right thing for me to do right now in my life, but man is it scary! I'll post some post operation pictures as soon as I can. I'll be out of the blog world for a little while but, I'll be back!